Surviving separation: how to navigate your new life as a single woman

Recently separated from her partner, Louise is in the process of building a new life for herself and her four-year-old daughter. Knowing she needs guidance through this difficult and emotional time, she has created a support team of trusted professionals to assist her. With a financial adviser, a psychologist and a family lawyer to counsel her through the settlement process, Louise is in control and looking forward.

While she is concerned about money issues, receiving the correct financial advice has enabled her to manage her finances and be in charge of her own destiny.

Louise is, by nature, a positive woman. She hit her emotional ‘rock bottom’ when she was in the unhappy relationship so, while separation is a time for adjustment, she believes her life is now on the way up. Although things are tough at times, she knows that by working hard and educating herself, she will achieve her new goals as a single woman.

What to do when you have recently separated from your partner: 

1.    Take good care of yourself

o   Sleep well: not getting enough sleep impacts your thinking, mood, memory and learning, and can lead to chronic disease.

o   Daily exercise: even a little exercise increases the blood flow to your brain, which helps to combat depression, regulate your mood and promote good overall health and wellbeing

o   Nourish your body: healthy body = healthy brain

o   Create calm: take a moment every day to do something that brings you peace and joy. Meditate, walk, ready, play guitar, practise mindfulness – whatever works best for you.

o   Connect with others: having supportive friends, family and social connections helps you live longer, happier and healthier by reducing the negative impacts of stress.

o   Challenge yourself: keep your brain active by choosing activities that combine mental, social and physical challenges.

o   Believe: in yourself, your passion, your dreams and goals. Work towards those dreams and ask for help when needed.

2.    Surround yourself with people who lift you up with their positive attitude and energy. Take care to choose professional advisers wisely and take the time to build trust in them.

3.    Postpone any major decisions until you have been separated for over twelve months. Make sure your finances are under control before you purchase property, relocate or take on significant debt.

4.    Practice visualisation and journaling. Journaling is great for clarity as it helps to understand and prioritize any problems, fears or concerns. It also helps you practise positive self-talk and recognise any negative thoughts and behaviours. Visualise your ideal life. What does this look like? What’s important to you? What do you need to do to achieve your goal?

5.    Write a legacy letter that contains your values, beliefs and hopes for the next generation. Include your insight, stories and anything else you feel is valuable. This will create a positive document you can reflect on if you’re feeling down.

6.    Create – and stick to – a budget. The first six months will be tough to get used to a new flow of money, so it’s important to know how much you need to live on and follow your budget. 

7.    Volunteer. It’s good for the soul.

8.    Find a support group of women in similar situations - you will be able to help and advise each other through the difficult moments, and celebrate your successes.

9.    Make time for a passion or hobby that will distract you when you’re feeling negative and fill you with happiness and a sense of achievement.

Take the first step to financial strength and independence, contact TruWealth on 03 8648 6534 or email contact@truwealthadvice.com.au